Thankful

I think I'm finally at a point in my life to where I'm content. I have two awesome sons who I love more than anything, an amazing husband who I love more every day, my dad who I'm finally realizing after all of these years isn't the bad guy that my mom made him out to be, and that's really all that I need. I used to say that I'm going to keep having kids until I get a girl. I admit that both times that I was pregnant and was told they were boys, I was more than disappointed. I wanted and still do a little girl more than anything. My mom prayed both times that I'd get a boy, but now, I don't think that my body could handle being pregnant again, and I don't want to have to upgrade vehicles again since I just got my Jeep and I love my Jeep. I'm perfectly happy with my boys.

My relationship with my dad has gotten better. Nathan even suggested that he come stay with us because of how my mother is being. She spent all of their money this month, never cooks dinner, don't clean the house, hardly does laundry, and only wants to sleep all the time. I feel so bad because for years she blamed everything on him, but I'm beginning to wonder if she was just saying all that crap to make herself look better. He's helped us out so many times when he shouldn't have. But until she gets help, I don't want to be around her, she refuses to take responsibility for her actions. And I don't want my boys around that. I'm jealous of people who have perfectly normal parents and relationships with them, especially those whose mothers aren't nut jobs.

One thing that I can't wait for is to get another house. I wish that we wouldn't have even gotten this place. We can't drink the water, there is no storage, no fence, and in all honesty, I'm partly embarrassed of it. I mean, who is proud to live in a double wide? I miss having a real house, a brick house. I miss having carpet, cable Internet, water that you can drink, being close to stores, etc. but I'm thankful for a roof over my head. It was a huge mistake getting this place, but our neighborhood was getting bad, and my family's safety was priority. Hopefully soon we will have a nice house with a fenced yard and close to everything.

Yeah, there are times when I am jealous of people who can lose weight without trying, or who have a disposable income, or no debt, but then I remember where Nathan and I started out. When we got married we lived with my parents, and literally had NOTHING, and look at where we are now. We have two nice vehicles, just about anything we could want, our kids don't want for anything. They have anything a kid could want. So I'm thankful for what we have and for where we came from.